The priest tops his 7-iron and dribbles the ball out a few yards.The young man says, "I don't know about you, father, but in my church, when we pray, we keep our head down."Police are called to an apartment and find a woman holding a bloody 3-iron standing over a lifeless man.The detective asks, "Ma'am, is that your husband?" Yes" says the woman."Did you hit him with that golf club?" Yes, yes, I did." The woman begins to sob, drops the club, and puts her hands on her face."How many times did you hit him?" I don't know -- put me down for a five."A golfer teed up his ball on the first tee, took a mighty swing and hit his ball into a clump of trees. He found his ball and saw an opening between 2 trees he thought he could hit through.Taking out his 3-wood, he took a mighty swing. The ball hit a tree, bounced back, hit him in the forehead and killed him.As he approached the gates of Heaven,St. Peter asked, "Are you a good golfer?"The man replied: "Got here in two, didn't I?The bride was. Her dad was a Class A homebody, andwhile he might go to occasional work functions, or take her mother out tocelebrate special occasions, he was much, much happier staying right here.Especially on a Sunday night."Nahh- your mom got some shrimp for shrimp cocktail, and I'm planning ongrilling up some steaks and veggies. Why? What are you thinking?" "Well, the last Hangover movie came out a couple weeks ago, and Sherriand I had said that once finals were over and the track season was overthat we'd go see it before it left the theaters." Don't you have an exam tomorrow?" he asked this, but there wasn't a traceof concern in his voice, just mild wonder that his daughter would deviatefrom script by going out the night before an exam."I just have to hand in my take home test for Mrs. Zarek's class by ten.I worked on it all last week and finished it up last night-" You did homework on a Saturday night!" her father teased her with mockastonishment in his voice leading Sarah to just roll.
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